Dolphin Torpedoes R US

Dear Readers,

This blog is currently # 7 IN THE WORLD for relevance to the Google search “dolphin torpedoes.” I know with your help we can make this number 1!!!!

I encourage you to link all your friends to my posts about dolphin torpedoes here and here.

We will not settle for silver, bronze, or a participant rainbow-coloured ribbon in this contest of wills!

Update:
LOLOLOLOL! I never even thought of looking on Google Images. Check the first couple images there and see what the sources are:

That's my website - we're number 1 for advertising the nature of dolphin torpedoes to the world!!!!

It really sucks we're not #2 as well - what was Google thinking? Just because the Olympics say I can't get two medals - I mean, heck, they let the Nazis in! Why should I listen to them? QED.

AND we're apparently also #5 - GOOD JOB COUNTING DOCTOR GOOGLE.

Dolphin torpedoes – a biological solution to all your warfare needs!

Dolphin torpedoes!

Wacky Wailing Inflatable Arm-Flailing Dolphin Torpedoes! Wacky Wailing Inflatable Arm-Flailing Dolphin Torpedoes! Wacky Wailing Inflatable Arm-Flailing Dolphin Torpedoes! Wacky Wailing Inflatable Arm-Flailing Dolphin Torpedoes! Wacky Wailing Inflatable Arm-Flailing Dolphin Torpedoes! Wacky Wailing Inflatable Arm-Flailing Dolphin Torpedoes! Wacky Wailing Inflatable Arm-Flailing Dolphin Torpedoes!

This CLAIMS to be a dolphin torpedo, but certainly lacks any reasonable payload to be half as awesome as a real DOLPHIN TORPEDO.

Your old bathing products letting you down? Let the DOLPHIN TORPEDO explode the dirt away!

Dolphins often engage in pack behavior, which can include mentoring of young. In this picture, an older dolphin leads the newly initiated male into the ways of DOLPHIN TORPEDO-ING NAZI U-BOATS! Because Nazis are the natural enemies of DOLPHIN TORPEDOES! NO - I'VE NOT MERELY CREATED THIS OUT OF WHOLE CLOTH! RATHER, IT IS THE NATURAL ORDER OF THE UNIVERSE. SO THERE.

The DOLPHIN TORPEDO has clear dominance in the food chain within other sea-dwelling creatures. They try to run, but THEY CAN"T HIDE FROM THE DOLPHIN TORPEDO! AND, YES, I CAN USE TWO APOSTROPHE MARKS WHEN SPEAKING ABOUT DOLPHIN TORPEDOES BECAUSE THE RULES OF GRAMMAR AND PHYSICS NO LONGER APPLY (somewhat like Virgil's poetry, ironically).

A rare sighting of the BOVINE TORPEDO alongside the more deadly DOLPHIN TORPEDO! While commonly mistaken for one another, the difference between them is patently obvious after nothing more than a cursory inspection.

An artist's rendition of a DOLPHIN TORPEDO at his sentencing hearing.

ALMOST GOT YOU THERE!

GRAND HIGH AWESOMENESS IS A CRIME IN NO COUNTRY!

However, as some of you have complained to me personally of the lack of substantive content in this series of posts, I have included the following learn-ed discussion on the nature of dolphin torpedoes by the great Albert Einstein. I prithee enjoy what ensues.

http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/7899349/

 

Please do not call any mental health professionals after that video.

While I voluntarily wear a white habit, this does not indicate that I would also like to wear a white jacket.

Yours in Christ,

Br. James Dominic, OP

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  1. #1 by erin on December 2, 2010 - 10:07 am

    Who needs substantive content when you have dolphin torpedoes!?!?!

  2. #2 by Paul Hamilton on December 2, 2010 - 11:32 am

    FYI. I have laughed very hard at these posts. Very hard.

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